Are You A Unity Disrupter in Your Church?

Division can cripple a church.  As a pastor, I have learned that I must foster and protect unity, or my church will never reach its potential.  I have learned many lessons about unity over the years that I could share.  Here are three big ones.  

Three Lessons About Unity

First, unity is fragile.  It's fragile because people are often fragile.  It doesn't take much to cause a conflict.

Second, unity doesn't happen automatically.  Early on I assumed that if I could just lead people to fall in love with Jesus and study their Bibles, that unity would naturally follow.  Wrong!  I have learned the hard way that as a leader I must take intentional, strategic steps to foster and protect unity.  

Third, unity must be taught.  One way to be intentional and strategic about fostering unity is to teach it at church.  (That's the purpose of this blog post -- not as a reaction to current strife, but as a preventative.)  People must be taught that unity is a biblical command, and that it is a sin to disrupt the unity of the church.  People need to be taught that unity is close God's heart -- Christ prayed for it in John 17.  People need to be taught that unity is something that requires effort and sacrifice.  And people need to be taught how to avoid being a "unity disrupter."  

A unity disrupter is someone who, well, disrupts unity.  They are people who, usually unintentionally, behave in a way that causes conflict, strife, and disharmony in the church.  True Christians do not want to be unity disrupters, so I have learned that if I can clearly show people how to avoid being a unity disrupter, it goes a long way toward protecting the unity of the church.  In this post I have composed a list of seven unity disrupters -- seven types of people who destroy the unity of the church.

Ten Unity Disrupters

1) People who throw a fit when they don't get their way.  This is the person who asks the church leadership if they can start a new ministry, or use the building for something, or be on a certain team or committee, etc., and when their request is denied they throw a fit.  They aren't upset because the pastor is sinning or teaching false doctrine, but because the pastor won't let them be in charge and call the shots.  They need to remember Hebrews 13:17, "Obey your leaders and submit to them...."  

2) People who treat every doctrine as a first-order doctrine.  Doctrines should be categorized by their importance.  A first-order doctrine must be affirmed to be a Christian (e.g., the Apostles' Creed).  A second-order doctrine must be affirmed to be a member of a church.  These are identified in a church's doctrinal statement.  A third-order doctrine is something that people in the same church should be able to disagree on.  As a general principle, if it is not clearly laid out in the church's doctrinal statement, then it should be fair game.  Examples of third-order doctrines in my church are Arminianism/Calvinism, eschatology (Amil, Premil, Postmil, or Dispensational), and the gift of tongues (cessationism or continuationism).  A unity disrupter is someone who treats every one of their theological beliefs as a first-order doctrine.  If you don't agree with them on every point of doctrine, then you are not a good Christian.  

3) People who teach false doctrine.  This is the person who intentionally teaches things that are contrary to the church's doctrinal statement.  This person is not necessarily a non-Christian or a heretic in the sense that they have denied the essentials of the Christian faith, but they are a false teacher in the sense that they are knowingly teaching things that contradict the church's doctrine.

4) People who are resistant to change.  I know, the only people who like change are babies with dirty diapers.  But some people forget that the church is driven by mission, not tradition or denomination or even personal preference.  For the church to be effective, it must be willing to stop doing things that are ineffective and to try new ideas -- even things that no other church is doing.  This is the way every effective organization operates.  It disrupts unity when you treat a method or a tradition as a biblical mandate.

5) People who are unwilling to forgive.  Rub shoulders with someone long enough, and eventually you will hurt each other.  You will offend each other, let each other down, and disappoint each other.  If you are unwilling to give grace, exercise patience, and forgive, then you will not be able to stay in any church for an extended period of time.  

6) People who are unable to receive correction/criticism.  A healthy church practices church discipline.  When a church member is living in sin, the church is commanded to lovingly confront and correct.  A person who is unapproachable or who gets offended when corrected will cause strife and will either leave the church or cause others to do so. 

7) People who triangulate.  Triangulation takes place when one person offends another, and in response the offended party goes to a third person to complain about what happened.  This creates a triangular dimension to the conflict (three people) when only two people needed to be involved.  When you are offended, the proper way to handle it is to go in private and in person and discuss it with the person who hurt you.  Others should not be involved unless the offender refuses to repent.

The church of Jesus Christ has been instituted by God and tasked with an important mission -- the Great Commission.  But if we can't get along, then we can't get things done.  Let's all work together to be boat-rowers rather than boat-rockers, to work with and not against each other.  "How delightfully good when brothers live together in harmony (Ps 133:1)!"