Tuesday, June 21, 2016

What Children Need From Their Parents

The book of Proverbs provides timeless wisdom that we can trust.  If you want to know what your children need, don't take your cues from the culture around you.  Just look to the Bible.  The following are 6 needs children have according to the book of Proverbs.  You can listen to the full sermon HERE.

First, children need boundaries.  See Proverbs 22:15.  Many families are backwards; the children are in charge, and the parents are very obedient.  But children aren't ready to call the shots, and that's why many families are dysfunctional.  Children need boundaries -- protective limits you place on their decisions.

Second, children need a married mom AND a dad.  See Proverbs 1:8; 6:20; 10:1.  Many in our culture have come to believe that a child's needs can be met in a single-parent home, or with two moms, or two dads.  But the Bible is clear and social research confirms that children raised by their married mother and father have a huge advantage in life.  A healthy, Biblical marriage is the best environment for a child to grow up.  Guard your marriage!

Third, children need religious teaching.  See Proverbs 6:20.  Many believe that parents shouldn't push religion on their kids.  If that means that you shouldn't force your kids to believe, then I agree.  But if that means that you shouldn't force your kids to learn the faith and attend church with you, then I wholeheartedly disagree.  Children need parents who will disciple them at home, and then consistently bring them to church.

Fourth, children need rebuking.  See Proverbs 1:8; 15:5.  Children need parents who have the courage to say, "Stop that!  That behavior is sinful/foolish/inappropriate.  Let me explain why."  Without being hyper-critical, rebuke.  A few tips:  Rebuke gently, privately, and sparingly.

Fifth, children need spanking.  See Proverbs 13:24; 22:15; 23:13-14; 29:15; 20:30. God knows what your children need better than you do.  If you want what's best for them, spank them.  They won't hate you.  It won't scar them for life.  It won't teach them to be violent.  It will teach them to avoid bad behavior.  When is it appropriate to spank?  That's a parent's decision, but Lydia and I usually reserve spanking for outright defiance.  (Pinching the child's trapezius muscle can be equally effective.)

Sixth, children need protection from bad influences.  See Proverbs 13:20.  Children are highly impressionable.  They are influenced by what they watch, read, listen to, and by the people they hang around.  Children need their parents to protect them from bad influences.  One of the best ways of doing this is homeschooling.  Homeschooling gives parents much more control over the people and media that influence their child.  You don't have to homeschool, but you must come up with an effective strategy to protect your children.

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