Bible Commentary | Ephesians 5:22

Ephesians 5:22 (CSB) Wives, submit, to your husbands as to the Lord

Submit

Word Study | 5293: submit (hupotasso)

MacArthur Study Bible: “The command is unqualified, applying to every Christian wife, no matter what her own abilities, education, knowledge of Scripture, spiritual maturity, or any other qualifications might be in relation to those of her husband.”

MacArthur Study Bible: “The submission is not the husband’s to command but for the wife to willingly and lovingly offer.”

MacArthur Study Bible: “Your own husbands” limits her submission to the one man God has placed over her, and also gives a balancing emphasis that he is hers as a personal intimate possession (SS 2:16; 6:3; 7:10). She submits to the man she possesses as her own.”

Note: It doesn’t say “if he deserves it.”

“The Greek word for submitting does not refer to being under the absolute control of another but to voluntarily placing oneself under the authority of another.”  NKJV Study Bible, Eph. 5:22

“The Greek term for submission has military origins, emphasizing being under the authority of another. The word does not connote a forced submission; instead it is a voluntary submission to a proper authority. Thus Paul seems to be saying that wives should voluntarily place themselves under the authority of their husbands. The same word is used to describe Christians voluntarily submitting to governmental authorities (1 Pet. 2:13) and younger people submitting to the wisdom of their elders (1 Pet. 5:5). In this passage, Paul gives the illustration of the church’s submission to Christ. After encouraging wives to submit to their husbands, Paul goes on to describe how children should obey their parents, and slaves their masters. Their subordination is described in terms of obedience, instead of in terms of voluntary submission.”  NKJV Study Bible, Eph 5:22

“Moreover, submission does not imply inferiority (cf. Gal 3:28) but a difference in role since Christ functionally submits to the Father (1 Cor 15:28).” NIV Biblical Theology Study Bible, Eph 5:22

“Instead of telling wives to “obey” (Gk. hypakouō), as was typical in Roman households, Paul appeals to them to “submit” (Gk. hypotassō), based on his conviction that men have a God-given leadership role in the family. The term suggests an ordering of society in which wives should align themselves with and respect the leadership of their husbands.”  ESV Study Bible, Col 3:18

“The Gr. verb denotes willingly putting oneself under someone or something.” MacArthur Study Bible, Col 3:18

“To submit is to recognize one’s place under someone else in a social order.”  NLT Study Bible, Col 3:18

Elizabeth George writes, “In the Bible, submission is primarily a military term meaning to rank oneself under someone else.  This attitude is lived out by subjection and obedience, by leaving things to the judgment of another person and yielding or deferring to the opinion or authority of someone else (referencing Vine’s Expository Dictionary and Webster’s New Collegiate Dictionary).  A Woman After God’s Own Heart, p. 65.

Elizabeth George writes, “The husband’s headship doesn’t mean we wives can’t offer input or ask questions for clarification during the decision-making process.  But the husband’s headship does mean that he is responsible for the final decision… In the end, the husband is accountable to God for his leadership decisions and we are accountable to God for how we submit to that leadership.”  A Woman After God’s Own Heart, p. 66.

Elizabeth Elliot describes her father’s headship in her childhood home: “Head of house did not mean that our father barked out orders, threw his weight around, and demanded submission from his wife.  It simply meant that he was the one finally responsible.”  The Shaping of a Christian Family, p. 75.

Elizabeth George outlines the Bible’s teaching on submission with the following insights (A Woman After God’s Own Heart, p. 66): 

1. The fact of submission.  All Christians are called to submission.  Within the church, for example, we are called to submit to one another (Eph 5:21).  This means “we move away from selfishness, and, acting out of honor for other people, defer to them.”
2. The Decision to Submit: It is the wife’s responsibility (Eph 5:22).  No one can make her do it, or do it for her.  It is a free gift from wife to husband.
3. The Who of Submission: Your own husband (Eph 5:22; 1 Pt 3:1).
4. The How of Submission: “As unto the Lord (Eph 5:22).”  
5. The Scope of Submission: “In everyting (Eph 5:24).”
6. The Strength to Submit: “We are afraid of what will happen if our husband does things his way instead of our way.”  Our strength comes from trusting in God (1 Pt 3:5-6).  “It is by faith that yo and I believe God works in our life directly through our husband.  It is by faith in our sovereign God that we submit to our husband, trusting that God knows his decisions and the end results of those decisions, and trusting that God redeems, if not guides those decisions.  And so it is by faith in God that our fear is dispelled and we gain the strength to submit.”
7. The Motive for Submission: To glorify God (Titus 2:4-5).

Bruce Wilkinson defines the wife's submission as “following and supporting in love,” “affirmation, willingness, and unadorned loyalty,” and “the loving will to follow.”  Experiencing Spiritual Breakthroughs, p. 152.

Andreas Kostenberger writes, “The second important lesson for married couples, then, is that the instructions for wives and husbands… are directed to Spirit-filled believers rather than those outside of Christ.  It should therefore surprise no one that Paul’s words are foolishness to those who do not follow the path of Christian discipleship.”  God, Marriage, and Family, p. 58

Andreas Kostenberger writes, “The kind of submission Scripture is talking about is not akin to slavery where one person owns another.  It is not subservience where one person is doing the bidding of another without intelligent input or interaction.  It is not even truly hierarchical, since this conjures up notions of a military-style, top-down chain of command in which the soldier is asked to obey, no questions asked, the orders of his superior… Rather, the biblical model for marriage is that of loving complimentarity, where the husband and the wife are partners who value and respect each other and where the husband’s loving leadership is met with the wife’s intelligent response.” God, Marriage, and Family, p. 63-64.

Andreas Kostenberger writes, “If Christ chooses to submit to God the Father while being equal in worth and personhood, there seems to be no good reason why God could no have designed the husband-and-wife relationship in such a way that the wife is called to submit to the man while likewise being equal in worth and personhood.” God, Marriage, and Family, p. 64.

Andreas Kostenberger “… a more accurate way of looking at marriage roles is to understand that wives are called to follow their husband’s loving leadership in their marriage.  This leadership and submission is to take place in the context of a true partnership, in which the husband genuinely values his wife’s companionship and counsel and the wife sincerely values her husband’s leadership.”  God, Marriage, and Family, p. 62

Andreas Kostenberger writes, “Their submission is not to be grudging or perfunctory but loving and willing.  The Greek word for ‘submit,’ hypotasso, conveys the notion of ‘placing oneself under’ another person’s authority, which implies that this is done voluntarily rather than under compulsion.  Eph 5:21-33 links wives’ submission with respect for their husband.  This respect ought to be freely given.  Respect doesn’t mean uncritical adoration, just as submission doesn’t mean subservience.”  God, Marriage, and Family, p. 111

John MacArthur “Scripture makes clear that there are no spiritual or moral distinctions among Christians (Gal 3:28).  There are no classifications of Christians.  Every believer in Jesus Christ has exactly the same salvation, the same standing before God, the same divine nature and resources, and the same divine promises and inheritance.  But in matters of orle and function God has made distinctions.  Although there are no differences in intrinsic worth or basic spiritual privilege and rights among His people, the Lord has given rulers in government certain authority over the people they rule, to church leaders He has delegated authority over their congregations, to husbands He has given authority over their wives, to parnets He has given authority over their children, and to employers He has given authority over employees.”  The MacArthur New Testament Commentary, Ephesians, 280. 

John MacArthur “Wives is not qualified, and therefore applies to every Christian wife, regardless of her social standing, education, intelligence, spiritual maturity or giftedness, age, experience, or any other consideration.  Nor is it qualified by her husban’d intelligence, character, attitude, spiritual condition, or any other consideration.”  The MacArthur New Testament Commentary, Ephesians, 280.

John MacArthur “Hupotasso means to relinquish one’s rights, and the Greek middle voice emphasizes the willing submitting of oneself.”  The MacArthur New Testament Commentary, Ephesians, 280.

John MacArthur “The wife is not commanded to obey (hupakouo) her husband, as children are to obey their parents and slaves their masters (Eph 6:1, 5).  A husband is not to treat his wife as a servant or as a child, but as an equal for whom God has given him care and responsibility for provision and protection, to be exercised in love.  She is not his to order about, responding to his every wish and command.  As Paul proceeds to explain in considerable detail (vv. 25-33), the husband’s primary responsibility as head of the household is to love, provide, protect, and serve his wife and family – not lord it over them according to his own personal whims and desires.”  The MacArthur New Testament Commentary, Ephesians, 281.

as to the Lord

Kostenberger writes that “as to Christ” means that it is part of your Christian discipleship; part of your responsibility as a Christ; what must be done to please the Lord.

NIV Study Bible: “as an act of service to the Lord.”

MacArthur Study Bible: “her attitude is that she lovingly submits as an act of obedience to the Lord who has given this command as His will for her, regardless of her husband’s personal worthiness or spiritual condition.”

D.M. Lloyd-Jones (An Exposition of Ephesians) says, “It is a part of your duty to the Lord, because it is an expression of your submission to the Lord… In other words, you are not doing it only for the husband, you are doing it primarily for the Lord Himself.”